Funny Vintage Ads (39)

Advertising has always been an interesting way to look at history. But when you see these vintage advertisements, the past seems a lot stranger than you thought.

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One should always try to be discreet when disposing of Sputum.
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Madge the manicurist ("You're soaking in it") insulted her customers' hands in print and on television for 27 years.
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The Sears Motor Buggy debuted 1908, the same year as the Ford Model T. But while Ford revolutionized auto assembly and brought down his costs with the assembly line, Sears was building their buggys one at a time and selling them for less than they cost to build. Sears ended production in 1912.
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"...every Pyrex prepared meal a good looking, good tasting treat"

Good looking? Maybe, but it won't make your crappy meals taste better.
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"No notes to read. No dreary practice."
The International Musical Saw Association (IMSA) produces an annual International Musical Saw Festival (including a "Saw-Off" competition) every August in Santa Cruz and Felton, California.
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Our tires are made with pure rubber and cotton fabric collected by happy natives.

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When surgery was not an option for uterine prolapse, this device was employed to hold the uterus in place.
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"Styled for Sleep" or for discussing flight schedules with your "daddy."

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Before there were loudspeakers, people could only listen to radio with headsets. In 1923, Magnavox developed a power amplifier and speaker that turned radio into an entertainment center for the whole family.
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Are you a one-date girl? Have you considered upping your fibre intake? Regular loving requires a lover who is regular.
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"Vitamin rain" was a clever way to describe the vitamin solution the cereal was sprinkled with as it traveled down the conveyor belt.
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These "Rocket Shoes" will rocket you into a face plant!
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In 1970, Ohio Art invented a toy phonograph and promoted it as the "World's Smallest Record Player." It also had the world's worst sound.
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"That man -- he's done it again"
He needs a beer fridge
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The Marvel Whirling Spray Syringe (aka douche) was first produced in the 1890s. Not only would it rinse your vagina but it could also suck the rinse water out.
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This "Atomic Chief" outfit was produced by John Henry Products in 1947.

The "Two-way Mike" was the equivalent of two tin cans tied together with a string.
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If you are this close to a nuclear attack, you won't need to worry about survival.
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"We have no use for them since we got this wonderful washer."
This racist 1886 advertisement for a laundry detergent called the Magic Washer references the 1882 Chinese Exclusion Act.
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"Including sanitary equipment" -- a bucket.
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In 2007, researchers at the University of Rochester found that those who consumed candy cigarettes as kids were roughly twice as likely as those who hadn’t to report that they later became smokers.
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Hey everybody! Who wants some potato salad cake?
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"When you use a douche, you find its scent all around you...on your body...in the air." Douching was used as a contraceptive until birth control pills were legalized, and manufacturers had to find other ways to promote their products.
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If you are calling that a pocket radio, customers are gonna need much bigger pockets.
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"Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a fashion model."
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Throughout the 1950's and 1960’s, the trade group Sugar Information Inc. ran ads to convince people that sugar was actually healthy. In 1971, the Federal Trade Commission put a stop to the ads.
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Early radios only had headphones before speakers were invented. And before power amplifiers were invented, the next innovation was these large horns that amplified the sound acoustically.

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This poster was produced for nuclear workers at Oak Ridge National Laboratory in 1947.

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During WW2, women were encouraged to enter the work force, and as soon as the war was over they were told to give up their jobs for returning servicemen. The woman in this poster looks like a wax figure and she is holding some invisible item in her hands.

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You could blow up your boss, but nuclear warfare is usually not good for business.

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"Get a Real Tan -- Not a Fake Orange Tan"...like the orangutan-colored Donald Trump!

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Buy a No Soliciting Sign
That Really Works!

End Police Brutality

On May 25, 2020 George Floyd, a 46-year-old black man, died in Minneapolis, Minnesota after Derek Chauvin, a white police officer, knelt on Floyd's neck for almost nine minutes while Floyd was handcuffed face down in the street. The murder of George Floyd triggered massive protests in the US and around the world.

The police response to the unrest has been very aggressive. There have been so many examples of wanton police violence against mostly peaceful protesters and the media covering them in so many different cities that it's clear the problem is a lot bigger than rogue cops killing unarmed black men without consequence -- as if that weren't bad enough. The shocking brutality meted out by cops when charging at innocent protestors of all ages is being captured on video.

      

Respect the Police...or Else?

Too many Americans are authoritarians who love it when cops bust a few heads in response to a protest. Even during normal times, if you are questioned by police and "mouth off" to a police officer, you can expect them to "teach you a lesson" about "respect for authority" and authoritarian Americans will happily cheer them on. That needs to end.

Here's a clue for all the authoritarians who think disrespecting the police should be a capital offense. A cop can question you, but you don't have to answer any questions, you don't have to be polite, and you don't have to stay and listen to them, unless you are being "detained." So if you want to leave, you should ask, "Am I being detained?" A detention is defined as a  “brief and cursory” holding and questioning of someone by a law enforcement officer. If you refuse to answer questions they should move on quickly. If they take that as a challenge that results in your arrest, they won't be able to prove "probable cause" unless you do something stupid.

If a cop gets in your face, he's invading your space, so if you decide to stand up and leave, you're not invading the cop's space and it doesn't justify any restraint. And finally, if a cop grabs you for no reason and your hand happens to brush their arm, that's not an assault on a police officer. If officers decide to manhandle you or beat you, anything you do to resist will be used by them to justify the beating.

The above is all good until you are arrested. Once arrested, do not resist and do not answer questions, other than requests for your name, address, and birth date. Do not volunteer any information. Do not agree to them going through your phone. Anything you say, no matter how innocuous it might seem at the time, WILL be used by cops to prove that your arrest was justified. Once released, contact your lawyer or Legal Aid.

The toxic cop culture in the US has to change.

Here are some suggestions from #8cantwait and a couple of additional ideas:

1. Requiring officers to de-escalate before using force;

2. Using guidelines defining the types of force that can be used to respond to specific situations;

3. Restricting or banning choke holds and strangleholds;

4. Requiring a verbal warning before using any force;

5. Prohibiting officers from shooting at moving vehicles except in extreme circumstances;

6. Requiring officers to exhaust other options before resorting to deadly force;

7. Establishing a duty by officers to intervene if one of their colleagues is using excessive force;

8. Requiring officers to report all uses of force or attempted use of force.

9. Law enforcement violence should be addressed as a public health issue.

10. Prosecutors should charge more cops with crimes and juries who are always reluctant to convict cops who abuse their power, have to put aside their automatic deference for members of law enforcement and put a lot more in prison.

11. Police unions are currently an obstacle to meaningful reforms. They will dig in their heels and make all kinds of threats to punish politicians who try to enact reforms. We can't control the unions but we can control the politicians if we keep up the pressure on them.

There will have to be a lot more protests and demonstrations before any meaningful changes are made, and remember;

Non-violent Protest is Best

“When it gets down to having to use violence, then you are playing the system’s game. The establishment will irritate you – pull your beard, flick your face – to make you fight. Because once they’ve got you violent, then they know how to handle you. The only thing they don’t know how to handle is non-violence and humor.”
-- John Lennon

"Non-violence is the greatest force at the disposal of mankind. It is mightier than the mightiest weapon of destruction devised by the ingenuity of man."

-- Mahatma Gandhi