Friday, July 23, 2021

Funny Vintage Ads (55)

 Advertising has always been an interesting way to look at history. But when you see these vintage advertisements, the past seems a lot stranger than you thought.

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Sir Vival

The most grotesque thing to ever sally forth on four wheels,the Sir Vival was a concept car created by Walter C. Jerome of Worcester, Massachusetts in 1958.
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Erector Set - Hello Boys
Erector was a brand of metal toy construction sets which were patented by Alfred Carlton Gilbert and first sold by his company, the Mysto Manufacturing Company of New Haven, Connecticut in 1913.
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Firestone Tire Accessories
 In the early days of automobiles, people had to repair their own flats. The Firestone Tire & Rubber Company was founded in 1900, in Akron, Ohio.
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More Power to You- America's Independent Electric Light and Power Companies
The amazing technology advertisers show us in their "World of Tomorrow" never includes humans with updated fashions and gender roles.
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Palmolive Test
"But if you have a Palmolive complexion, it won't wash off" but aren't you also washing with soap AND water?
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Elmira Greeting Cards
Your free ride is over Jane. Get a job!
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Portable Commodore Executive 64
The Commodore SX-64, also known as the Executive 64, was released in 1983, weighted a hefty 23 pounds and cost $995. A small price to pay so one could avoid having to interact with their family, even while on vacation.
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Colgate's Antiseptic Rapid-Shave Powder
In 1806, William Colgate established a starch, soap, and candle factory on Dutch Street in New York City under the name William Colgate & Company. Today, Colgate is the only brand in the world purchased by more than half of all households.
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Thank God for the Atomic Bomb
Psychiana was a religious movement created in 1928 by Frank Bruce Robinson, with headquarters in Moscow, Idaho. It began and largely remained a mail-order enterprise, recruiting people through advertising in popular magazines and through direct mail solicitations.
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Fuller Brush Company
The Fuller Brush Company was founded in 1906 in Connecticut by Alfred C. Fuller with $375 worth of supplies and equipment. By 1956 the company had 7,000 full-time distributors who visited 90% of American homes and a sales catalog that reached approximately 5 million people.
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No vermins in my kitchen
Actually it's YOUR kitchen ma'am, so maybe you should call an exterminator.
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Venereal Disease Gone to War
In World War II venereal disease was a serious problem for the US Army. One in eight men were infected with some form of venereal disease. Mercury was considered standard treatment for STDs, until Penicillin replaced it in the mid-1940s.
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Vibra Gum Massager finger
Vibrator manufacturers in the 1950s couldn't advertise what their products were actually meant for so they utilized various subterfuges, like calling their product a dentist recommended "gum massager."
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DuPont Health Tan Sun Lamp
Actually a sun lamp can burn and you should protect your baby's eyes!
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Hypnosis - Think and be thin
Hypnosis can help you lose weight, but it doesn't work on everyone and self-hypnosis is much less effective.
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Central heating in your volkswagen
"Central Heating" sounds impressive, but it's really just a blower-motor.
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Should a gentleman offer a Tiparillo to a Census taker
"Should a gentleman offer a Tiparillo to a Census taker?"
Should a male fantasy include twins with maximum cleavage?
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In 1907, a Scottish engineer, unable to get financial backing in the UK, took his idea for a fire extinguisher to the US. He established what became known as the Pyrene Company of Delaware in 1909.
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Chase Sanborns Dated Coffee
"You know stale coffee can give people nerves." Chase & Sanborn Coffee was established in 1862 in Boston, Massachusetts.
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Sugar- Fat time of Day
The Sugar industry wants you to believe that anytime is the right time for a sweet treat and that sugar will help prevent overeating.
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El-Tronics Prospect for Uranium
YOU'LL SOON BE RICH, but significant exposure to uranium can cause kidney disease, bone cancer or lung cancer.
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The Garfield Telephone
The perspective in this photo makes the phone look huge, but it was actually about the size of a kitten. The Garfield Phone came with a number you could call and talk to him.
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Pursettes - The tampon that's right even for single girls
Tampons were initially advertised for married women only, because many people thought women could lose their virginity if they inserted one.
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Ford Pinto - Model T
In 1978, Ford Motor Company agreed to recall 1.5 million Ford Pinto and 30,000 Mercury Bobcat sedan and hatchback models for fuel tank. design defects which made the vehicles susceptible to fire in the event. of a moderate-speed rear end collision.
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K &A Mop Bucket for Mother's Day
 "Add years to Mother’s life..."
Giving this gift is more likely to take a few years off of your life.
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L. L. Cooke School of Electricity
The L. L. Cooke School of Electricity was an early (1927) correspondence course on electrical theory and practice. Until the 1960s, it
was the largest institution in the world devoted to teaching electricity by home-study.
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Quaker Oats - Growth
So if you're short, it's your own fault! 
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1960 Electric Shopper
The Electric Shopper began production in 1961. It was powered by a 1 hp DC electric motor that gave a top speed of around 18 mph.
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This is how I trapped my man
 The idea that women need to scheme and "trap" a man went out with the 1950s.
 
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Fasteeth - I'd rather be fat than have loose False Teeth
A false dilemma is a logical fallacy. If your dentures are loose you'll probably eat less rather than more, so how are you going to get fat?

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